Wednesday, April 05, 2006
i was kind of thinking that i would like,do better in this test than in E Maths 'cos you know, i spent four hours going through loggies and stuff. maybe i would get at least ten, maybe fifteen? then ms chan placed my paper on my desk and my heart and guts nearly spilled out.
i got a SIX. SIX UPON FORTY.
that was worse than e maths. well what was i supposed to do??? cry???whine???laugh it off??? i am sad about it but i don't know how to show it, so even though i may laugh and seem indifferent, i'm really feeling wrecked inside. god i feel so awful now. yesterday when i told my mother about my E Maths (just e maths. i was afraid the blow would be too hard if i told her about my abysmal chemistry mark) she didn't attempt to murder me. she sort of told me not to give up and accept the fact that people in our family are right-brained dominant. today in the car on the way to school she sort of contradicted herself. she told me i had to analyze the problem and solve it. ha! yeah.
analyze.solve. that's for left-brainers, d'ya know?
it would be nice to live in an utopia. i learnt that word today during PUMP and i was doing my '1100 Words You Need To Know'. an utopia is 'a perfect place'. PUMP was sorta boring of course. Felicia and Nadine and I sat together. then at 4.15 we left for EDS. even though we turned up late ms cheong/han was kind enough not to punish us. felicia told a porker. she made it sound like we had rushed all the way from PUMP. er,rushed? i don't think so. strolled,more like. anyway it turns out we're like the only ones in drama who aren't vying for roles. well i don't mind. i hate acting and looking stupider than usual. so we just became the permenant audience. then felicia started some crap about farting noises. and then SHE started talking about what if ms c farted and her baby came out??? that was absolute lame crap but we laughed like loons on loon tablets anyway. and when felicia found that the stupid little thing could make me laugh loonably, she kept at it the rest of the EDS session and while we were walking to her car. so great. everyone from EDS and everyone who happened to be near the volleyball/basketball courts now thinks i am a mad hatter. and probably band people too.
[and that's when i knew you knew.]
at 7:34 PM
